December 2020 - The Divine Secret Garden Newsletter - Volume 004 - Article 004

Defining Oneself
Looking deeper beyond the flesh and blood!

Stephanie Marts
The Divine Secret Garden Magazine, Author & Contributor.
Stephanie Marts



When tasked with defining self, the average person generally begins by rattling off some of their labels. These are the roles and titles they’ve been given during an incarnation. As if to say, I am the sum of these things: name, job, age, culture, marital and/or parental status, etc.

Unfortunately, they fail to look deeper and thus are unable to recognize who and what they are, content to identify with superficiality. We begin collecting these labels at a young age and live our entire lives bound in servitude to them.

Sadly, most do not stop unless there is a spiritual awakening. At which point, one begins to understand they are Spirit and through the transformation of Christ, preparing them to shed the identification with labels and the idea of limitation.

Many are called but few are chosen. One of the deeper aspects of this message lies in the understanding, if you cannot surrender to the Father, then you will not be chosen. And a fundamental part of surrendering is denying self. But what does that mean? You can think of it on several levels, though they are tied together, and all are needed to be successful.

Matthew 16

Then Christ said to His disciples, “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross (burdens) and follow Me.

Galatians 5

For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you must not do whatever you want.

Level 1 is denying the flesh. The avatar that we wear was created by our slave masters. It is born of and intimately connected to this fallen realm. Through the use of technology, you have been entombed in darkness.

The nervous system acts an antenna and the brain is programmed with mind of Lucifer and Satan. Part of this programming includes the ability to influence DNA /gene expression, built in firewalls, exaggerated fear responses, social mirroring, and heightened carnal urges. It is designed specifically to be adversarial to and limit the connection to Spirit.

When we follow the whims and lusts of the flesh, we remain a servant of the world, trapped in our lower mind, disconnected from Spirit. In order to break free, our desire must become strong enough to assert our will over the flesh.

Galatians 6

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of the Father. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.

Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ have denied the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.


Level 2 involves coming out of the world and relinquishing our will over to the Father. As we travel the path of awakening there are points along the way that present potential blocks. These areas in the road are both general and personalized.

And since Satan knows our weaknesses, they will be difficult to overcome. Using this example, all of us have been instructed to come out of the world, which is general guidance, yet in this endeavor, there will be personalized aspects to it that may pose a problem based on our weaknesses.

Matthew 6:24

No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve the Father AND the world (Artificial Spirit – Matrix).

Romans 12:2

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of the Father.

Coming out of the world means to extricate your mind from the world. No longer giving it the importance and status that it once held. But it may also mean physically disengaging from a problematic person or thing.

For example, if your job is so demanding that it takes all of your time and you allow it to take priority over the Father because you are accustomed to the lifestyle that it affords, well, then that is an issue and you will not advance.

Your love of the world stands in front of the Father. The choice is yours to make. But, if you are unable to let go, spiritually you will remain at that block in the road having the opportunity to try again in the next loop.

Basically, anything that we are attached to is a potential problem. Be it pride-ego, pleasures of the flesh, love of money-things, still being in love with the world, family or personal relationships and/or obligations, or even being wrapped up in ‘your story and suffering’.

2 Corinthians 6

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? Therefore, Come out from them and be separate. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you.

Luke 14:26

If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple.

This does not mean we HATE our families. It means there will be conflict and division because their minds are still connected to the artificial spirit, and yours is not. If the relationships and the influence they wield create conflict in your mind which entices you to rejoin in the affairs of the world, by placing them in front of the Father, then your journey will end where it is.

Nothing must stand in front of the Father. NOTHING. We deny the importance of our roles and everything in the exterior because we know that ‘we’ are more than the body and raiment and it would be silly to give up our inheritance to remain in the illusion of death for a person or thing. Especially when we know there is a plan for all of us to return home, and nothing should stop that from happening.

In denying ourselves, we must also relinquish the concept of control, of steering. For we walk by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 5). Understand, you were never in control anyway. It was always your belief in the illusion, because of your dense lens of perception, that falsely gave the impression of control. We were always sitting in the back seat being driven by another.

The Matrix program was ultimately created and or allowed by Lucifer, the fallen Sophia, who was afforded the FULL SUM OF WISDOM. Let that sink in….the FULL SUM OF WISDOM. There truly is no other way but through the Father and Christ.

We must surrender our will, allow Christ to make the necessary changes within us, and be led by our all powerful – Omniscient Father, who cherishes & loves us more than any other, which will lead us out of this dark maze.

And If you think you are in control because you’ve been awakened and ignorantly believe by your own efforts you can steer yourself home, then your crown will be removed, and your mind will be returned to the artificial spirit.

1 Corinthians 10:13

No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but the Father is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted by Satan beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.

Although the road is difficult, a way will always be provided for so long as you believe and can let go in trust. Faith is the answer, like that of a little child. Just hold your Parents hand and allow them to lead you home without any concern for how it will be done.

Level 3 is becoming the identification with spirit rather than soul. Individuality is gained through lifetimes of experience in role play. It is the experience rather than the role that matters. Yet some have a hard time disentangling from their story.

How does one come to understand that which shaped you, fundamentally isn’t you? We are not the titles and roles that we have been given….we are Spirit. None of this is real, yet our emotions and learning that are related to these experiences ARE real. We are all undergoing refinement through pain and suffering, so how do you move beyond it?

Getting caught up in the narrative of your experiences means that you haven’t fully internalized who and what you ‘really’ are, nor have you grasped the lessons that you have obtained, which often were wrapped in suffering. It is as if you are still unwrapping the gift while fiddling with the paper, so to speak.

Spend the time to integrate the knowledge and look deep within yourself. When you can become grateful for the lessons present through suffering, you will be able to move past the identification with suffering. Sometimes the mind wants to focus on the hows and whys of suffering itself rather than the lesson. This takes discipline and understanding to put that aside.

There may also be some benefit in thought exercises, meditation, to overcome the programming. For example: I am not (insert name), I am not (insert job), I am in a holodeck i.e. virtual reality, part of an elaborate program, because I am of Spirit, not flesh, I am of life, not death. Nevertheless, in the end, you must DECIDE to let go.

We should strive to think of ourselves as the expanded version in Spirit, rather than being immersed in the character we are currently playing. If we continue to view ourselves as flesh and blood, we will never move past listening and reacting to the stories we tell ourselves and spiritual growth will be stunted.

You must overcome fear and disbelief and develop faith to move beyond, but in order to overcome fear and disbelief, you must know and act like you are more. Surrendering the who and what you were, to be that which you are and will become.

BY: Stephanie Marts


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